22.10.08
Quickie
She always had a smudge of charcoal just below her left ear, as if some careless bit of art had leaned in for a kiss and left a little of itself behind.
11.10.08
Nostalgia
Want to hear the most awesome thing? I ate Lucky Charms for breakfast this morning. The marshmallows tasted exactly the same as they did when I was a kid. In fact, the taste was so familiar that I was instantly transported back to a morning in my childhood when my two friends and I ate an entire box of Lucky Charms and polished off an entire gallon of milk.
Needless to say they didn't taste that good after that memory. Ug! What a tummy ache.
Today I'm doing laundry, reading New Moon, and maybe watching some movies. It's one of those gradual days that wanders towards evening all day. The clouds are dark and low and the whole pace of the day is almost in slow motion. The air is the perfect temperature, still shorts and tank top weather but with just a nip in the air that makes you shiver at random moments. Random delicious moments. It's like when it rains in the winter and you're able to spend the day in socks with a mug of warm spiced cider doing nothing especially. Makes me want to bake cookies.
TImes like this I feel like I'm standing on the bank of the river of life watching it rush by me in a blur. I know the stream rushing past me is cold and uncomfortable but it takes my places. It gets me where I need to be. Days like this are when I'm just sitting on a warm rock on the edge of it all, enjoying the senses of it all without really being a part of it. As if for a split moment I'm standing outside of life itself.
In the Outlander series Diana Gabaldon refers to moments like this as Claire's "Moments of Grace".
I don't try and put a name to it, I just enjoy it, thank the goddess it happened and then step back into the current of life.
Needless to say they didn't taste that good after that memory. Ug! What a tummy ache.
Today I'm doing laundry, reading New Moon, and maybe watching some movies. It's one of those gradual days that wanders towards evening all day. The clouds are dark and low and the whole pace of the day is almost in slow motion. The air is the perfect temperature, still shorts and tank top weather but with just a nip in the air that makes you shiver at random moments. Random delicious moments. It's like when it rains in the winter and you're able to spend the day in socks with a mug of warm spiced cider doing nothing especially. Makes me want to bake cookies.
TImes like this I feel like I'm standing on the bank of the river of life watching it rush by me in a blur. I know the stream rushing past me is cold and uncomfortable but it takes my places. It gets me where I need to be. Days like this are when I'm just sitting on a warm rock on the edge of it all, enjoying the senses of it all without really being a part of it. As if for a split moment I'm standing outside of life itself.
In the Outlander series Diana Gabaldon refers to moments like this as Claire's "Moments of Grace".
I don't try and put a name to it, I just enjoy it, thank the goddess it happened and then step back into the current of life.
10.10.08
Just when you think things are going well...
I just got home from taking Donovan to the Emergency Room for a wrist injury. We got there at about noon and we. just. got. home. It was stressful. The good news is that his wrist isn't fractured and there doesn't seem to be a sprain but they put him in a splint anyway "Just in case". So he will be in a splint and sling for at least the next couple of days. It'll be tough on him but he's mature enough to deal.
Am I mature enough to deal?
No clue.
Am I mature enough to deal?
No clue.
Holding the Door Open for a Woman
She put her hand on her stomach. It was an unconscious movement she probably would have stifled had she been aware of it. It came so naturally to her now she didn’t even realize it when her hand rose and rested against the slight curvature of the womb that lay hard against her palm. There was a connection there. Nothing as dramatic as telepathy or symbiosis, just a knowledge. It was as if the movement itself was the communication. A gentle vibration answered by the slight resting pressure.
9.10.08
Really?! Seriously?!
Last night a really good friend of mine woke me in the middle of the night because mutual neighbors of ours knocked on her door at 1:30 in the morning and proceeded to yell at her and terrify her until she could finally get her door shut. The male neighbor was holding the door open yelling at her. She is already terrified of men because several of her past beaus have tried to kill or maim her and having a strange angry man trying to bully his way into her house at 1:30 in the morning did nothing to alleviate this.
What precipitated this late night siege on my good friend's abode?
Last week my friend's turtle was taken by one of the neighborhood kids and when she went to the kid's house to get her turtle back the kid's mom said she knew nothing about it.
So now the same woman has her boyfriend beating down my friend's door telling her she shouldn't accuse people of things. Bullying their way into the home of an already traumatized woman, ensuring that my kids, my friend's kids and said neighbor's kids will never be able to play now...
all because her kid walked off with a turtle.
My husband and I went to the woman's house to find out why she would do such a thing and the woman acted like she had been sleeping and didn't know what we were talking about. (see a pattern here?)
Cops were called. Police reports were filed. Sleep was lost. All for what?
Because one woman couldn't act like an adult for two seconds. Because she felt so guilty about being caught lying she felt the need to vindicate herself through shock and awe tactics. Swoop down on her house in the middle of the night when she and her children are all alone and make your boyfriend bully her until she's in hysterical tears.
Really?! Seriously? Can we just grow up?
(10/08/2008)
What precipitated this late night siege on my good friend's abode?
Last week my friend's turtle was taken by one of the neighborhood kids and when she went to the kid's house to get her turtle back the kid's mom said she knew nothing about it.
So now the same woman has her boyfriend beating down my friend's door telling her she shouldn't accuse people of things. Bullying their way into the home of an already traumatized woman, ensuring that my kids, my friend's kids and said neighbor's kids will never be able to play now...
all because her kid walked off with a turtle.
My husband and I went to the woman's house to find out why she would do such a thing and the woman acted like she had been sleeping and didn't know what we were talking about. (see a pattern here?)
Cops were called. Police reports were filed. Sleep was lost. All for what?
Because one woman couldn't act like an adult for two seconds. Because she felt so guilty about being caught lying she felt the need to vindicate herself through shock and awe tactics. Swoop down on her house in the middle of the night when she and her children are all alone and make your boyfriend bully her until she's in hysterical tears.
Really?! Seriously? Can we just grow up?
(10/08/2008)
Enjoyable and Productive
What an awesome morning! The leaves are just starting to turn and there is a chill in the air. In fact, this morning was the first morning I got to see my breath. D ran in from the bus stop and pulled me outside so I could see his breath and I caught some of his kid-excitement. I love the fall. I got up yesterday to find it had rained and it was cold. We drank hot tea and apple cider and I cleaned the house in preparation for Michael's surprise birthday party. The whole day was fun and I got a lot accomplished. You know you've had a good day when it was productive and enjoyable.
And now its back to the grindstone but not without enjoying the beautiful fall day around me.
(10/06/2008)
And now its back to the grindstone but not without enjoying the beautiful fall day around me.
(10/06/2008)
Crossroads
There are a lot of things going on in my life so I figure I better get on here and document them before I make a horrible mistake. Blogging always makes my choices seem a bit more clear.
I'm a sophomore this semester and while I love being in school and learning you kind of get to the point where you hope to see the end in sight. You want to be able to chart your course and, when charted, my journey has about seven more years left. I'm beginning to feel like Odysseus and that isn't a good thing. The graphic design program just isn't what I thought it would be. It's long, arduous, and if I'm perfectly honest with myself, I'm not learning anything. As much as I love Graphic Design, I haven't enjoyed one of my classes since I started this whole debacle. The most fun of my life has been drawing and creative writing. If the GD program weren't so intensive maybe I could get through it but I have two years left of just Graphic Design. That doesn't even begin to count the language classes, creative writing classes, Gen Ed classes, and Honors classes I have to take. My graduate date would be sometime in 2013. I would be graduating from college the SAME year as D would be graduating from HIGH SCHOOL! And like I said, it would be different if I were actually learning anything in the program but I'm not.
I've thought about changing to a studio arts minor or a drawing major. I hate to have the last couple years of my life be a waste but I don't want the next seven years of my life to be a waste either. My other option is to just ride it out. Get all of my Gen Ed, Honors, Language, and Creative Writing Classes out of the way, take the couple of classes that I need to fulfill a studio arts minor and then see how I feel. Maybe I'm just burned out. Maybe if I wait a couple of semesters something in the Graphics Design program will change for the better... Then I'll have BA in Creative Writing and at least a minor in art if not a major in Drawing. I'll graduate with honors. Can you believe one of my GD professors suggested I either slack in one of my other classes or drop the honors program in order to devote more time to graphic design. Yeah, why don't I just sell some of my kids while I'm at it, they take up WAY too much of my time. Hmph.
The second reason I jumped on here after so long is because I was feeling introspective. I saw two people I knew today and I didn't call out to them or say hello because I was afraid that I was mistaken and it wasn't them and that would leave me open to embarrassment. Leave me open to embarrassment?! I didn't say hello to someone I cared about because there was a chance that when they turned around the face of a stranger might have been staring at me. Then they would have said "I'm sorry you must be mistaken." and then I would blush momentarily but we would laugh about it and then go our separate ways. Then next time I would call out to them as a joke and maybe we would become friends. So now, not only did I not say hello to a friend but I also crushed what could have been a great opportunity to meet someone new. Because I was afraid to be embarrassed. How pitiful is that? All to protect me from a second of vulnerability. What a coward.
One of these days I'm going to take the (ahem, excuse the trite phrase) road less traveled and be proud but for today... today is a good day and I think I'll let it ride.
I'm a sophomore this semester and while I love being in school and learning you kind of get to the point where you hope to see the end in sight. You want to be able to chart your course and, when charted, my journey has about seven more years left. I'm beginning to feel like Odysseus and that isn't a good thing. The graphic design program just isn't what I thought it would be. It's long, arduous, and if I'm perfectly honest with myself, I'm not learning anything. As much as I love Graphic Design, I haven't enjoyed one of my classes since I started this whole debacle. The most fun of my life has been drawing and creative writing. If the GD program weren't so intensive maybe I could get through it but I have two years left of just Graphic Design. That doesn't even begin to count the language classes, creative writing classes, Gen Ed classes, and Honors classes I have to take. My graduate date would be sometime in 2013. I would be graduating from college the SAME year as D would be graduating from HIGH SCHOOL! And like I said, it would be different if I were actually learning anything in the program but I'm not.
I've thought about changing to a studio arts minor or a drawing major. I hate to have the last couple years of my life be a waste but I don't want the next seven years of my life to be a waste either. My other option is to just ride it out. Get all of my Gen Ed, Honors, Language, and Creative Writing Classes out of the way, take the couple of classes that I need to fulfill a studio arts minor and then see how I feel. Maybe I'm just burned out. Maybe if I wait a couple of semesters something in the Graphics Design program will change for the better... Then I'll have BA in Creative Writing and at least a minor in art if not a major in Drawing. I'll graduate with honors. Can you believe one of my GD professors suggested I either slack in one of my other classes or drop the honors program in order to devote more time to graphic design. Yeah, why don't I just sell some of my kids while I'm at it, they take up WAY too much of my time. Hmph.
The second reason I jumped on here after so long is because I was feeling introspective. I saw two people I knew today and I didn't call out to them or say hello because I was afraid that I was mistaken and it wasn't them and that would leave me open to embarrassment. Leave me open to embarrassment?! I didn't say hello to someone I cared about because there was a chance that when they turned around the face of a stranger might have been staring at me. Then they would have said "I'm sorry you must be mistaken." and then I would blush momentarily but we would laugh about it and then go our separate ways. Then next time I would call out to them as a joke and maybe we would become friends. So now, not only did I not say hello to a friend but I also crushed what could have been a great opportunity to meet someone new. Because I was afraid to be embarrassed. How pitiful is that? All to protect me from a second of vulnerability. What a coward.
One of these days I'm going to take the (ahem, excuse the trite phrase) road less traveled and be proud but for today... today is a good day and I think I'll let it ride.
16.12.07
Enjoying the Present and Looking Forward to the Future
Well, finals are over and I am dying to see my final grades. Mike says they won't be up until at least the eighteenth but I religiously go to check every day. I hope I won't be disappointed. I already know my viciously ignorant 3-D design teacher gave me a B. I may have gotten an A in Art History in spite of that first C if I scored a high enough A on the final. Ceramics and 2-D Design are for sure A's. So now its just a waiting game.
We also are waiting to hear if Mike got the job that will literally pay the rent for the next couple of semesters. Community Assistant comps the rent and gives us a little over $100 every two weeks. Instead of calling or emailing us, however, he mailed a letter stating whether or not Mike got the job. Don't these people realize how impatient I am!!!
I got to read a book for enjoyment for the first time in almost a year this week. It is amazing. Being able to sit back and relax guilt free without thinking, "I should be studying." It's been nice. Also, the house is semi-clean. It's not a total disaster and I've been able to keep up with the dishes. Laundry. That's another story.
Anyway, its been awesome to be able to take some time to myself. I can get back into posting, yoga, praying, etc. I do look forward to next semester though!! I'm really excited about next semester! Creative Writing, Mythology, Photoshop. It's bound to be interesting...
We also are waiting to hear if Mike got the job that will literally pay the rent for the next couple of semesters. Community Assistant comps the rent and gives us a little over $100 every two weeks. Instead of calling or emailing us, however, he mailed a letter stating whether or not Mike got the job. Don't these people realize how impatient I am!!!
I got to read a book for enjoyment for the first time in almost a year this week. It is amazing. Being able to sit back and relax guilt free without thinking, "I should be studying." It's been nice. Also, the house is semi-clean. It's not a total disaster and I've been able to keep up with the dishes. Laundry. That's another story.
Anyway, its been awesome to be able to take some time to myself. I can get back into posting, yoga, praying, etc. I do look forward to next semester though!! I'm really excited about next semester! Creative Writing, Mythology, Photoshop. It's bound to be interesting...
10.12.07
Just Can't Seem To Kick This
I know I promised to post more but for some reason I've gotten sick and I can't seem to get well. It started with the flu moving smoothly and flawlessly through a sinus infection and landing square in the lap of strep throat. As soon as I have finished finals and start to feel better you will see a marked increase in posting... that is if anyone still reads this thing.
25.10.07
How Very, Very Sneaky of Me
I've decided that posting here is a great way to put off things I really should be doing, like writing my report for Art History, working on my sculpture project or doing my collage. Sitting here trying to gather my thoughts is so much more pleasant. The best thing to do would be to get them done tonight so I can clean tomorrow but instead I'm here chilling out waiting for the girls to be ready for me to wash their hair. I think they are too busy fighting over the soap. One of these days they are going to have to start taking separate baths. In fact, I don't think they'll be happy until they're in separate area codes.
Mike works until midnight tonight so I think I'll go work on that collage... or maybe that giant stuffed book I'm making for sculpture.
6 more days until the best holiday of the year!!
Mike works until midnight tonight so I think I'll go work on that collage... or maybe that giant stuffed book I'm making for sculpture.
6 more days until the best holiday of the year!!
24.10.07
Son called 911 to report mom's driving
Article Date 10/23/2007
Son called 911 to report mom's driving
Son called 911 to report mom's driving
VANCOUVER, Wash., Oct. 23 (UPI) -- A Vancouver, Wash., woman whose 8-year-old son phoned police because he was frightened by his mother's driving was charged with driving under the influence.
Paulette Lynn Spears pleaded innocent Monday to driving under the influence of intoxicants, fourth-degree assault and two counts of reckless endangerment, The Vancouver Columbian reported Tuesday.
The assault charge stems from allegations that she bit her son to hang up the phone while he was speaking with a 911 dispatcher, the newspaper said.
"I don't know if she knows where she's going," the boy told a dispatcher. "I'm 8 years old, and my sister is 5 years old and she's in the car, too."
The boy made a second 911 call after his mother forced him to hang up the phone.
Clark County Deputy Prosecuting Attorney Erin Culver told the Columbian deputies that intercepted Spears' car said she had "red, watery eyes," a "blank stare" and an odor of alcohol. She refused a breath test but admitted to having "some beers."
Spears could face one year in jail if convicted. She is due back in court Nov. 14, and bail was set at $10,000.
--
Copyright 2007 by United Press International.
All rights reserved.
23.10.07
How Did I Do That?
Don't you love getting an A on a midterm you were sure you had flunked? Here's to knowing the difference between ancient Greek and ancient Roman architecture!
I'd Rather Be Doing Dishes.
You know you should not be posting when you look at the blank page and it's so overwhelming you actually wonder if you wouldn't rather be doing the dishes. Then I began to wonder about the motive of posting. I haven't posted in here in years and rarely on my diaryland page so why am I here now? Is it merely because a long lost friend of mine has finally popped up on the radar and I want to fill her in on all the *shit* that has been happening in my life?
I think that's a big part of it but I also think I have a lot to work out in my life. I have so many questions that need answers, so many joys and victories to shout from the rooftops, so many shoulders that need to be cried on.
The trick is, do I have the time to keep up with it? Do I have the discipline to keep up with it? Will I post one big huge post about all that has happened in my life and then that will be it for another three years? Would that necessarily be a bad thing? Can't I write one post without inundating my readers with questions? Probably not.
I'm antsy for those dishes. In fact I just got up with the intention of doing them.
Here is the scoop: That cute little baby down there? That drooling-pooping-giggling-cooing little nuk-nuk muncher down there in the archive... She's three. She's making trains and singing "If you're happy and you know it", she's potty trained and drinks out of a big girl cup. That such a miraculous transformation has occurred from that little pea in a pod to this beautiful butterfly takes my breath away. Before she was like a cute little figurine you set on your shelf and dusted lovingly. Your friends ooed and aahed over it but you really couldn't do a whole lot with it. Well, somewhere along the way I traded that figurine in for a go cart. She joined her first circle this month at our first Pagan Pride Day. It does a pagan mommy proud.
Speaking of proud, my eldest recently set up his first altar. He does pretty good with it too, barring the occasional psp game and who doesn't want to thank the Gods for video games? He also recently received Silver Ravenwolf's Teen Witch from a friend. How awesome is it that the pagan community thinks that my 9 year old is ready to be a teenage witch. Too bad he thinks so too lol. He loves paganism, anything with wheels on it, card games (pokemon and magic the gathering) and zebra cakes (another thing that brings proud tears to my eyes).
My elder girl is breathtaking. She's grown into a lovely young lady who says please and thank you and shows everyone around here that she will put you first. She is generous, caring and smart as a whip. We are having her tested for ADD and Dyslexia soon however because she is having trouble reading but her math is 100%. She told her teacher she is going to be an Etymologist when she grows up. The teacher didn't know what that was so my daughter explained it. How's that for proud moments.
As for me, your faithful stay at home mommy... well you knew it wouldn't last forever, didn't you? I went back to college. I hate saying it. Something about the way the word college sounds on my tongue and in my mind. Makes me want to grind my teeth. Anyway, I'm doing it. I'm a second semester freshman with a dual major in graphic design and creative writing. Again, are you seriously surprised? My first semester I got a 4.0. I'm now a crimson scholar. Can I keep it up this semester? Probably not, Art History 1 is killing my. My first test earned a C and it was open book. Yup I'm screwed. Ah well, if attendance and a kick ass paper can pull my grade up it will. If not I might not ever be a first semester sophomore. Yeah I'm on financial aid probation. Do go or we don't give you money to go to school anymore. Thing is, they are still figuring in the F's I got in 1995!! You'd think 4 A+s would void out for Fs but nope, I have to get at least 6 As to void them out.
Other news, I've started on my sleeves. For those of you who don't comprende I'm talking about full length tattoos that start at my shoulder and go all the way to my wrists. My left arm is done from wrist to elbow and my right arm is done from shoulder to elbow. Left arm got butterflies, right arm got the most kick ass pagan montage you have ever seen.
Also, for those of you who don't know me, I haven' seen my biological father since I was my baby's age. I was raised by my stepfather since I was one and thats the way I like it. My sperm donor has never done anything for me and doesn't care about anything but himself and apparently even that has ended. I got a phone call from my mother the other day with news that I either have to take an active interest in my real father's care or sign away my rights to make decisions in the future. What a deliciously karmic decision to throw at me RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF MID-TERMS!!! I still haven't made a choice but I think the weight is swaying heavily in one direction. Either sign away my rights and seem to be a cold uncaring bitch or keep the power and make decisions based on all the wrong things. Goddess, I love your sense of humor sometimes. I just wish it wasn't always pointed at me.
For the record I had stopped drinking. I hadn't had a drop of alcohol for 2 years. Well, I've started up again. I drink for three days every month. Those of you who know what endometriosis is will understand why. After struggling to find a pain pill that will ease the pain I discovered that if I have one glass of wine before bed the first three nights I'm good all day long pain wise. It's amazing! Vicoden didn't work, Hydrocodon didn't work, prescription grade Ibuprofen and Acetaminophen didn't work. One glass of wine a night relaxes the cramps enough to help me the whole next day. Yay for not having to take narcotics to get through the day.
Ok, well the diary seems to have won over the dishes but it can't compete against a nice hot shower (its freezing here!) and a cup of hot cider so I'll catch you all later.
Hugs!
Luna
I think that's a big part of it but I also think I have a lot to work out in my life. I have so many questions that need answers, so many joys and victories to shout from the rooftops, so many shoulders that need to be cried on.
The trick is, do I have the time to keep up with it? Do I have the discipline to keep up with it? Will I post one big huge post about all that has happened in my life and then that will be it for another three years? Would that necessarily be a bad thing? Can't I write one post without inundating my readers with questions? Probably not.
I'm antsy for those dishes. In fact I just got up with the intention of doing them.
Here is the scoop: That cute little baby down there? That drooling-pooping-giggling-cooing little nuk-nuk muncher down there in the archive... She's three. She's making trains and singing "If you're happy and you know it", she's potty trained and drinks out of a big girl cup. That such a miraculous transformation has occurred from that little pea in a pod to this beautiful butterfly takes my breath away. Before she was like a cute little figurine you set on your shelf and dusted lovingly. Your friends ooed and aahed over it but you really couldn't do a whole lot with it. Well, somewhere along the way I traded that figurine in for a go cart. She joined her first circle this month at our first Pagan Pride Day. It does a pagan mommy proud.
Speaking of proud, my eldest recently set up his first altar. He does pretty good with it too, barring the occasional psp game and who doesn't want to thank the Gods for video games? He also recently received Silver Ravenwolf's Teen Witch from a friend. How awesome is it that the pagan community thinks that my 9 year old is ready to be a teenage witch. Too bad he thinks so too lol. He loves paganism, anything with wheels on it, card games (pokemon and magic the gathering) and zebra cakes (another thing that brings proud tears to my eyes).
My elder girl is breathtaking. She's grown into a lovely young lady who says please and thank you and shows everyone around here that she will put you first. She is generous, caring and smart as a whip. We are having her tested for ADD and Dyslexia soon however because she is having trouble reading but her math is 100%. She told her teacher she is going to be an Etymologist when she grows up. The teacher didn't know what that was so my daughter explained it. How's that for proud moments.
As for me, your faithful stay at home mommy... well you knew it wouldn't last forever, didn't you? I went back to college. I hate saying it. Something about the way the word college sounds on my tongue and in my mind. Makes me want to grind my teeth. Anyway, I'm doing it. I'm a second semester freshman with a dual major in graphic design and creative writing. Again, are you seriously surprised? My first semester I got a 4.0. I'm now a crimson scholar. Can I keep it up this semester? Probably not, Art History 1 is killing my. My first test earned a C and it was open book. Yup I'm screwed. Ah well, if attendance and a kick ass paper can pull my grade up it will. If not I might not ever be a first semester sophomore. Yeah I'm on financial aid probation. Do go or we don't give you money to go to school anymore. Thing is, they are still figuring in the F's I got in 1995!! You'd think 4 A+s would void out for Fs but nope, I have to get at least 6 As to void them out.
Other news, I've started on my sleeves. For those of you who don't comprende I'm talking about full length tattoos that start at my shoulder and go all the way to my wrists. My left arm is done from wrist to elbow and my right arm is done from shoulder to elbow. Left arm got butterflies, right arm got the most kick ass pagan montage you have ever seen.
Also, for those of you who don't know me, I haven' seen my biological father since I was my baby's age. I was raised by my stepfather since I was one and thats the way I like it. My sperm donor has never done anything for me and doesn't care about anything but himself and apparently even that has ended. I got a phone call from my mother the other day with news that I either have to take an active interest in my real father's care or sign away my rights to make decisions in the future. What a deliciously karmic decision to throw at me RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF MID-TERMS!!! I still haven't made a choice but I think the weight is swaying heavily in one direction. Either sign away my rights and seem to be a cold uncaring bitch or keep the power and make decisions based on all the wrong things. Goddess, I love your sense of humor sometimes. I just wish it wasn't always pointed at me.
For the record I had stopped drinking. I hadn't had a drop of alcohol for 2 years. Well, I've started up again. I drink for three days every month. Those of you who know what endometriosis is will understand why. After struggling to find a pain pill that will ease the pain I discovered that if I have one glass of wine before bed the first three nights I'm good all day long pain wise. It's amazing! Vicoden didn't work, Hydrocodon didn't work, prescription grade Ibuprofen and Acetaminophen didn't work. One glass of wine a night relaxes the cramps enough to help me the whole next day. Yay for not having to take narcotics to get through the day.
Ok, well the diary seems to have won over the dishes but it can't compete against a nice hot shower (its freezing here!) and a cup of hot cider so I'll catch you all later.
Hugs!
Luna
6.4.05
18.12.04
Christmas is a'comin and the geese are getting fat...
9 days later and poor Ari is still sick. Keira and I have caught this cold/ ear infection and we are both miserable. It feels like it's been and endless cycle of sucking snot, doling out meds and fighting to put eye drops in. She's miserable most days and I'm so concerned about her (and my own) that I don't sleep at night. Luckily Michael has been home to help. My ears and throat are so sore and I'm coughing all the time. I worked today. I'll be surprised if I work tomorow, though we need the money because Mike missed so much work when he was sick.
My aunt, uncle and parents will be here for christmas next week.
Wish me luck.
My aunt, uncle and parents will be here for christmas next week.
Wish me luck.
9.12.04
The Beat Goes On- Laa-dee laa-dee lee
Michael's been home all week and still doesn't feel better. I can sense him getting worse and worse. I feel bad for him, with chores and the holidays, I've had him running the entire time. I'm gonna let him sleep in tomorrow, all day if he needs it.
Arianna seems like she's getting worse as well. She has huge circles under her eyes and she gets weepy and frustrated at the smallest thing. We took her to the doctor today and, of course, she's allergic to the meds he put her on. She broke out in hives. We went to the headstart parent meeting today even though she missed two days of class. I could feel the disapproving stares of the teachers and almost lost it when one of them said, "She doesn't get antlers because she wasn't in class when we made them." I'm sorry if I think my daughter's health is more important than construction paper antlers. Would it kill you to make a couple extra?
Mike and the kids have been feeling so bad I let them open their solstice presents early. The kids were so excited. Not every four and six year olds get their own tv and dvd player. Mike and I agreed a few big presents were easier in the long run than a bunch of small ones.
Michael got me addicted to a video game called Legacy of Caine: Defiance. We fight over who gets to play when. I'm actually kind of keeping up with him. I never thought I'd be good at anything but karaoke revolutions.
Keira is wonderful, just turning three months she's giggling, cooing, smiling. She likes to play peek-a-boo and suck her fingers. She also has a really soft stuffed monkey she grabs when she's getting ready for sleep. She's at the perfect age, when she looks up at you, recognizes you, and smiles, your heart melts and you just can't help but stop and say hello.
Arianna seems like she's getting worse as well. She has huge circles under her eyes and she gets weepy and frustrated at the smallest thing. We took her to the doctor today and, of course, she's allergic to the meds he put her on. She broke out in hives. We went to the headstart parent meeting today even though she missed two days of class. I could feel the disapproving stares of the teachers and almost lost it when one of them said, "She doesn't get antlers because she wasn't in class when we made them." I'm sorry if I think my daughter's health is more important than construction paper antlers. Would it kill you to make a couple extra?
Mike and the kids have been feeling so bad I let them open their solstice presents early. The kids were so excited. Not every four and six year olds get their own tv and dvd player. Mike and I agreed a few big presents were easier in the long run than a bunch of small ones.
Michael got me addicted to a video game called Legacy of Caine: Defiance. We fight over who gets to play when. I'm actually kind of keeping up with him. I never thought I'd be good at anything but karaoke revolutions.
Keira is wonderful, just turning three months she's giggling, cooing, smiling. She likes to play peek-a-boo and suck her fingers. She also has a really soft stuffed monkey she grabs when she's getting ready for sleep. She's at the perfect age, when she looks up at you, recognizes you, and smiles, your heart melts and you just can't help but stop and say hello.
7.12.04
6.12.04
'Tis The Season of Giving
It's that time of year again, when everyone has something and they all delight in giving it to someone else. No, I'm not talking about the holidays, I'm talking about cold/flu season. Arianna and Donovan have ear infections, Mike has something called a "viral throat infection" and Keira either had conjunctivitis or a clogged tear drainage canal. I don't have anything yet or, if I do, I don't have time to realize it. On Saturday I cleaned the living room, Ari's room and my own room. Plus, I worked four hours at Hot Topic. Sunday I got up at eight and did twenty loads of laundry, made lunch, worked for four and a half hours and started Donovan's room.
Still, I guess it's better than the stomach virus. I hate the smell that permeates the house and the way Ari and Donovan tremble when I hold them. I think this is more painful, though. What will I do if they give it to Keira? How will I know? The PA said it wasn't a contagious strain of ear infections but then how did Ari get it?
Did I forget to mention that Donovan has a cyst behind the ear that isn't infected and the PA wants us to break it open every day so it can drain?
I think the first level of hell is seeing your kids in pain.
Still, I guess it's better than the stomach virus. I hate the smell that permeates the house and the way Ari and Donovan tremble when I hold them. I think this is more painful, though. What will I do if they give it to Keira? How will I know? The PA said it wasn't a contagious strain of ear infections but then how did Ari get it?
Did I forget to mention that Donovan has a cyst behind the ear that isn't infected and the PA wants us to break it open every day so it can drain?
I think the first level of hell is seeing your kids in pain.
28.11.04
Remember What It Felt Like To Climb Into Your Ma's Lap?
I set up a website called Ma's Lap today. It's short for Mothers Against Lazy Parenting. It's one of the few things I feel strongly about. The amount of parents who just don't even try to be in their kid's life anymore. I understand that some people need daycare to cover their workday. I understand that not everyone can be a stay at home mom but when you don't bother to spend time with your kids when you are at home or if you forget you have kids. That's what's causing todays troubles. Know what your kids are doing, keep track of them, hang out with them and keep your eyes open.
I could never forget mine.
I could never forget mine.
The Finish Line
I can proudly say I finished the novel. It's not completely done. It needs several revisions and 50,000-100,000 more words but it's got a beginning, a middle, and an end. Every plot point has at least a chapter and I got to my goal of 50,000.
It makes me happy that something I've been working on for ten years is finally done. It's a workable piece and, from the opinions I've gotten, a damn good piece.
Keira seems to have broken down some kind of writer's black that the greasy grey put up. Maybe, for once, I really am happy.
My inner cat purrs
It makes me happy that something I've been working on for ten years is finally done. It's a workable piece and, from the opinions I've gotten, a damn good piece.
Keira seems to have broken down some kind of writer's black that the greasy grey put up. Maybe, for once, I really am happy.
My inner cat purrs
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